Concours d’Lemons Down Under 2018 – Photos

Posted October 5, 2018

Despite the best efforts of the Australian authorities, Concours d’Lemons Down Under took place at the Torrens Parade Grounds, in Adelaide, SA on Sept. 29, 2018. This second iteration of the show saw increased participation in nearly every category, with particularly fierce competition for the Kobbled Together Aussie Kangaroo Kart class. In classic Australian fashion when it was all done and dusted, the “winners” and losers congratulated each other and retreated to a pub for a few pints and to watch the Footy Grand Finals. Photos by Symon’s Pics, Cars Around Adelaide and The Concours d’Lemons Head Gasket, Alan Galbraith. Cheers Mate.

Photos by Symon’s Photos, Cars Around Adelaide and Concours d’Lemons Head Gasket, Alan Galbraith


WORST OF SHOW – Ross Smith – Datsun 280C (Japan)

 

RUST BELT AMERICAN JUNK (USA) – Andy Miller – Ford Country Squire

UNMITIGATED GAUL (France) – Phil Thompson – Renault R8

RUEFUL BRITANNIA (Great Britain) – Gordon Cowley – CowleyFordson Tow Motor

NEEDLESSLY COMPLEX ITALIAN (Italy) – David Nelson – Fiat Topolino

DER SELF-SATISFIED KRAUTTENWAGEN (Germany) – Paul Geiger – Volkswagen Beetle

SOUL-SUCKING JAPANESE APPLIANCE (Japan) – Scott Rankine – Suzuki Mighty Boy

SWEDISH MEATBALLS (Sweden) – Brad Berry – Volvo 242GT

WARSAW PACT (Czech Republic) – Tyson Boyce – Skoda Rapide

KOBBLED TOGETHER AUSSIE KANGAROO KARTS (Australia) – Jodie Murrin – Holden Camira

Concours d’Lemons CA 2018 – Photos

Posted August 30, 2018

The Concours d’Lemons once again lowered property values during the otherwise high rent 2018 Monterey Auto Week. Over 100 Oddball, Mundane and Truly Awful cars littered the verdant lawn of Seaside City Hall on Aug. 25, 2018 to the delight of a record crowd consisting of billionaires and parolees alike. The all-star judging crew included such notable personalities as Formula 1/Indy500/LeMans/Bathhurst/Nascar driver and commentator, David Hobbs; Nascar commentator, Mike Joy; Amelia Island Concours Founder, Bill Warner; Nascar Crew Chief, Ray Everham; “Chasing Classic Cars” host, Wayne Carini; 24Hours of Lemons Chief Perpetrator, Jay Lamm; and a cast of other miscreants that decorum prevents the mentioning of in public.  The judges colluded as often as possible by accepting bribes from participants hoping to secure thrift store sourced trophies. The results of the rigged witch hunt were tabulated by Classic Motorsports Magazine publisher and Head Judge, Tim Suddard, using a Curta Calculator, quadratic equations and lots of grain alcohol.  A flim-flam awards ceremony followed, during which a 1977 AMC Gremlin, owned by Jim Callahan of Oakland, CA, that had been modified to resemble a Zimmer was awarded the coveted “Worst of Show” trophy. Jim and the Gremlin were then showered in Silly String by the adulatory crowd. Classic Motorsports Magazine and Hagerty Insurance inexplicably sponsor the whole debacle, so its really all their fault.

all photos © Howard Koby



Worst Of Show
Asher Schlusselberg El Paso, TX/Jim Callahan Oakland, CA 1977 AMC Gremlin

“Winners”

Rust Belt American Junk – GM
Dave McCabe Saratoga, CA  1951 Cadillac

Rust Belt Amercan Junk – MOPAR
Jason Henderson Sacramento, CA 1974 Plymouth Satellite

Rust Belt American Junk -Ford
Walt Ogden Oakdale, CA 1925 rusty T-Bucket

Rust Belt Amercan Junk – Other
Shelby Wright San Jose, CA 1983 AMC Eagle Wagon

German Cars
Randy Carlson Aguanga, CA 1960 VW Beetle

Japanese
Benjamin Brandt Sand City, CA 1995 Nissan Altima

English
Drew Barker Hollister, CA 1971 MG MGB GT

French
Roelof Pot Santa Cruz, CA 1966 Citroen 2CV

Swedish
Daniel Harrison California 1962 Volvo PV 544

Kommunist Kar
Carl Schubert La Honda, California IFA F9

Italian
Alberto Massarotto San Jose, CA 1984 Fiat Ritmo Cabrio

Chronic Dick Teague Syndrome
John Johnston Aptos, CA 1974 AMC Gremlin

Worst Ecological Disaster
Sean Rigmaiden Seaside, CA 1978 Volvo 242

Sight for Sour Eyes
Craig Weslin California 1976 Chevy Vega

Best Back Seat 
Milton Seaton Seaside, Ca 1996 Toyota Rav4

Driving On A Prayer 
Jason Simms Berkeley, CA 1987 Jag XJS V12 

Slightly Better than a Go Kart 
Tony Bird   San Diego, CA 1979 Volvo 244


Concours d’Lemons Michigan 2018 – Photos and “Winners”

Posted August 2, 2018

Hoopties, janky creations and obscure iterations of horrible cars took the verdant fairways at the Inn at St John’s in Plymouth, MI for the 4th annual Concours d’Lemons Michigan on July 28, 2018. “It just keeps getting bigger and stupider ever year,” beamed self-proclaimed Concours d’Lemons “Head Gasket” Alan Galbraith as he pondered participation in the event doubling over last year’s eye searing display of automotive mediocrity. “The Detroit area is rife with extremely nice examples of some of the American auto industry’s biggest mistakes, and they are showing up in force at the Concours d’Lemons.” Throngs of spectators marveled at the breadth and depth of four wheeled unpleasantness while politely laughing at Galbraith’s recycled jokes at the awards Ceremony.

Jim Eby took home the “Driving on a Prayer” special class trophy for completing the first 1500-mile leg from Florida to Michigan of his 8000-mile round trip quest to visit every Concours d’Lemons in America while driving a largely original 1919 Franklin purchased new by his grandfather. Jim is going to present the trophy to his 95-year-old father, who also took long road trips in the Franklin when he inherited it.  Coveted “Worst of Show” honors went to Will Door of Westland, MI for his flame spitting 1949/50 Rat Rod Truck/Hearse. A full list of winners can be found below and remember, Hagerty Insurance sponsors this whole debacle, so really, it is all their fault.


Worst of Show – Will Door, Westland, MI 1949/50 Rat Rod Truck/Hearse


Rust Belt American Junk (GM)
– Thomas Walters, 1987 Pontiac Fiero


Rust Belt American Junk (Ford)
  – Steven Roth, Farmington Hills, MI 1951 Ford Shoebox


Rust Belt American Junk (Other)
– Frank Schwartz, Davisberg, MI 1972 Dodge Coronet Wagon


Rueful Britannia
– Ryan Parkinson, 1973 Triumph Stag


Needlessly Complex Italian –
Frank Schwartz, Ann Arbor, MI 1974 Fiat 124


Soul Sucking Japanese Appliance
– Scott Sheridan, Pleasant Ridge, MI 1988 Suzuki Samurai


Unmitigated Gaul
– Andrew Dawson, Royal Oak, MI. 1992 Puegeot 505 DL Wagon


Swedish Meatballs
– Keith Price, Ferndale, MI 1994 Saab Convertible


Der SelfSatisifiedKrautenWagon
– Britany Sarkozi, Allen Park, MI 1966 VW Beetle


Kommunist Kar
– William Treid, Royal Oak, MI 1976 Lada 2101


Sight for Sour Eyes
– Brett Scott, Pleasant Ridge, MI 1997 Alfa Spider


Chronic Dick Teague Syndrome
– Justin LaPoint, Livonia, MI 1982 AMC Concord Wagon


Driving on a Prayer
– Jim Eby, Redington Beach, FL 1919 Franklin 9A


Slightly Better than a Go Kart
– Mike Austin, Ann Arbor, MI 1991 Honda Beat

Best Back Seat – Ryan Walch-Potter, Wayne, MI 1992 Ford F250

Ill-advised Tour of US in 1919 Franklin now slightly less stupid

Posted June 4, 2018

Undeterred by logic, reason or summertime average high temperature charts, Jim Eby still plans to drive his 1919 Franklin to the remaining Concours d’Lemons events in the US. But thanks to FAST Cooling, the premier brand for driver cooling systems, the whole plan just got slightly less stupid. FAST Cooling has stepped up and provided Jim with a FAST Cool Suit System so he doesn’t get heat stroke somewhere along the route.

Jill Swanson from FAST Cooling said, “Jim’s route takes him and the Franklin through the desert southwest in late August where average daytime highs hit over 100 degrees. The air cooled Franklin engine can handle the heat, but we weren’t so sure about Jim. Our FAST Cool Suit System is equipped with over 50 feet of tubing to circulate chilled water next to the body, keeping the drivers core temperate down.”

If you have as little common sense as Jim and insist on driving around in a hot car during summer, buy yourself a FAST Cool Suit System. It makes showcasing your mediocre driving skills in some hopeless racing series or touring the country in a 99 year old open car slightly less stupid and infinitely more comfortable. Just ask Jim’s relatives in the photo attached. They crossed the US in the very same Franklin in the 20’s, without the benefit of a FAST Cool Suit.

http://www.freshairsystems.com/

1919 Franklin Tour of America

Posted May 16, 2018

After collecting the coveted “Worst of Show” award at the Concours d’Lemons Georgia, Jim Eby plans to drive his 1919 Franklin to all the Concours d’Lemons events in the continental US, and we’d like you to help. If you live somewhere near the loosely outlined route of this road trip of near certain death you can help by offering up some garage space should something go terribly wrong and the 99-year-old Franklin require some repairs. Let us know by emailing your info to franklin@concoursdlemons.com and we’ll set up a chain of folks with a few spare tools and more common sense than Jim.

The Franklin tops out at about 45mph so Jim will be traversing the country on back roads, not the interstates. Progress will be further slowed by having to stop every 100 miles or so to oil the top end of the Franklin’s inline 6 air-cooled engine. Jim estimates he will be able to do about 250 miles a day before daylight and his will to live run out for the day. If by some miracle, Jim or the Franklin don’t expire on the roadside, they will face stiff competition from the exceptionally horrible cars that turn up for Concours d’Lemons Michigan, July 28, 2018 at the Inn at St. Johns in Plymouth, MI and at Concours d’Lemons California on Aug. 25, 2018 at Seaside City Hall in Seaside, CA. We told Jim the best he can probably hope for is a hastily made up “Road Hammer” trophy, but he was undeterred. He cited the family history of his grandfather, who bought the Franklin new as his first car, and his father to take the Franklin on long road trips. It appears automotive insanity run deep in some families.

Look for Jim on the road somewhere near these areas:

July 21, 2018 – Leave St Petersburg

Chattanooga TN (possible Coker Tire, Ruby Falls, etc)

July 27-29  – Plymouth, MI (Concours d’Lemons, Concours d’Elegance of America)

Jackson, MI

Traverse City, MI (visit Hagerty Insurance)

Mackinac Bridge crossing
Spring Lake Park, MN (Odyssey Restorations, Franklin friendly restoration shop)

From here, generally follow near, around or on US2 west
Grand Forks, ND
Minot, ND
Glasgow, MT
Shelby, MT

Glacier Park, MT (either US2 or Going to the Sun Pass)

Kalispel, MT
Spokane, WA
Portland, WA

Seattle, WA

Florence, OR (probably drive 101 all the way to SF, maybe follow some of the Pebble Beach tour route)

Oakland, CA (Alloy Motors hot rod shop)

Santa Cruz, CA

Aug 21-26 Monterey, CA (Concours d’Lemons, Monterey Auto Week)

Bakersfield, CA (5 acre Franklin bone yard, Crystal Palace, Buttonwillow Raceway)

Palm Springs, CA

Gotta do some Rt 66 somewhere along here

Phoenix, AZ (almost all my in-laws live there)

Across New Mexico

Somewhere in Central Texas (this part isn’t that well defined as of right now)
New, Orleans, LA

Then skirt along the gulf coast to hwy 19 in Florida and home.

The not set in stone route of Jim’s ill-conceived Tour to all of the Concours d’Lemons shows
Jim’s grandfather took the Franklin on a cross country road trip in 1929. Photo taken in the CA Desert.
Newspaper article about Jim’s father taking the Franklin on a long road trip in 1947