Kim Harmon iScrotium 500: Lemons iRacing – January 17, 2021

With the cancellation of the final 24 Hours of Lemons race of 2020, we were pretty upset that we would have no Kim Harmon Scrotium 500. Joy of joys, the Lemons iRacing League folks have stepped up to offer an alternative: the inaugural Kim Harmon iScrotium 500 at virtual Road Atlanta on January 17, 2021.

About Scrotium

Yeah, Lemons made a(nother) new word. Or element. Or something. Maybe a chemist will add it to the periodic table eventually. In any case, the legend of Scrotium grows longer by the year, having been created by our Event Manager Kim Harmon’s inability to pronounce “scrotum” in her Lemons Wrapup debut. Naturally, it took all of about three weeks for someone to show up with a Scrotium-themed car. Here’s a short explainer from our YouTube Channel:

When we first raced at Road Atlanta in 2017—near Kim’s home in Atlanta—we coined the race the Scrotium 500. Kim sported a custom “Largest Sac Race in the South” shirt and gave out scrotium trophies…pretty great stuff. The Scrotium name took a sabbatical but was supposed to return in 2020. Well, we know how that went, but our iRacing compadres have stepped in to make a substitute event!

The Inaugural Kim Harmon iScrotium 500

On January 17, the Lemons iRacing League will host the first iScrotium 500. What can you expect? Here’s the big-picture stuff:

• A $5 entry fee with the money going to our friends at Lemons of Love. For $10, we’ll figure out how to get you an event patch from the canceled Scrotium 500 race. Entries will be cut off either when the grid is full or on Friday, January 15.
• A 90-minute race at Road Atlanta with two drivers who are paired like a 1970s key party (Note: Lemons is not responsible for horrifying search-engine results).
• Commentary from the one and only Kim Harmon during the race broadcast, plus any other special guests we can get together.
• Your ability to enjoy that race broadcast live (or delayed) on the 24 Hours of Lemons’ Facebook page or YouTube Channel.
• Real trophies sent for the winners, the biggest donor to charity (Yes, this means you may raise additional funds for charity by driving with a five-volt pickle or whatever else you psychos can come up with), and probably a couple of subjective awards (This is Lemons, after all).
• Any other stupid stuff we can come up with to sweeten the deal.

“The big picture looks really stupid, so obviously I’m in. How do I enter?”

There’s something of a process here and being Lemons, we’re kind of making this up as we go. But we’re pretty sure this one will be fun. Here’s what’s gonna happen, using more bulletpoints:

1. The Kim Harmon iScrotium 500 is open to any Lemons iRacing League members. If you’re not a member, go to www.iSuckAtRacing.com, read the rules, and send us an email to sign up.
2. Your invitation is a receipt from Lemons of Love for the $5 Entry or $10 Entry Fee. Make that donation right here. Again, this is the link for the entry page. You can also make additional non-entry donations on the Lemons of Love donation/entry page during the race while you watch the livestream.
3. Once you’ve made your donation, send a screenshot or a PDF of it to VirtuallySlow@24hoursoflemons.com. Use the subject line “iScrotium 500 Entry” and include your iRacing name/ID in the body of the email. That’s your ticket in.
4. Deadline to enter is Friday, January 15. If all the grid spots fill before that, then we’ll close entries sooner.

“Then what happens?”

Great question. It’s more complicated than Lemons usually is, because it involves qualifying and some other moving parts. But we’ll make sure there’s a tutorial so you get it right. Here’s what’s up, featuring more bulletpoints:

A qualifying server will be set up with one session each on January 11-15. Log into any or all sessions to log a qualifying time. You can reset your best time up until the end of the session on Friday, January 15.

At the end of Friday’s qualifying session, we will randomly assign participants into two groups.

• Group A will be responsible for picking their car (From the Mazda Global MX-5 Cup or Volkswagen Jetta TDI CuP) and livery, plus driving first.
• Group B will be responsible for joining the team we’ve assigned to them.

The Real Key Party bit: Group B will not know the name of their Group A team/teammate until the race starts. Five minutes into the race, we’ll announce the driver pairings on Facebook, in the Discord server, and on the broadcast. Group B drivers will have to join the right team then.

Here’s what the race-day schedule will look like:

8 pm ET: Practice for all league members and Group A Only.
9 pm ET: Grid for Race with Group A starting.
9:05 pm ET: Driver pairings announced via Facebook, Discord, and on Broadcast. Group B drivers join their corresponding teams.
~9:45 pm ET: Driver changes start at half-distance.
~10:30 pm ET: Checkered Flag/Post-Race Crashfest

All rules from www.iSuckAtRacing.com and iRacing are applicable, but primarily remember “Don’t be a dick.” This is supposed to be silly fun, not an event where F1 scouts are looking for the next Lando Norris (which you are not).

And then?

We kind of have no idea, which is why we’re excited. Frankly, we’d love to do a Key Party Format event at a real Lemons race, but there’s some potential nut-hurt about people wrecking cars that others have spent real money on and so forth. But since this is all about being virtually awful, there’s basically no pressure.

That’s a good start on the FYI, but we’ve probably forgotten some details that we will tack on here as updates. In the meantime, if you have questions, email VirtuallySlow@24hoursoflemons.com and we’ll get you squared away.