Look at that beautiful…car. Thing. Whatever. It’s a Triumph Stag prepared for Lemons racing and it could be yours for the just-about-right price of $20. Our friends at Lemons of Love are raffling off the lovely red Malaise Era roadster right here on their site.
As of this posting, the Stag has generated more than $2,800 in donations to Lemons of Love. While that’s (obviously) not the car’s cash value—estimated at dozens of American dollars—that amount of money suggests it’s the most valuable Triumph Stag in the world. That’s the kind of provenance you can expect.
Lemons racer Andy Evans—himself having raced (and broken) a Triumph TR8—got this car from the veteran Duff Beer Racing squad after the 2019 season. Duff Beer managed to rack up trophies in it for a Class C win, an Organizer’s Choice, and a vaunted Index of Effluency. If you don’t change anything, you likely need not worry about graduating classes either. We can’t imagine a world where a Triumph Stag doesn’t stick in Class C for its new owners.
Lemons of Love will also send a patch and sticker from a canceled 2020 race to anyone who buys five or more of the Triumph Stag tickets. That’s a fine way to add to your Box of Inexplicable Memorabilia to explain to your disinterested relatives some day!
Duff Beer have run an entire stable of awful trash, but they possess an uncanny knack for making the best of bad machinery. In this case, they pitched the Stag’s horrible original Triumph V8 right away. Possibly, the previous owner had tossed the V8. Either way, it instead has a Buick 231 V6. That’s the Malaise Era predecessor to the ubiquitous Buick 3800 V6 we see in Lemons everywhere.
The transmission is also 1970s General Motors with a TH350 automatic. The Duff boys also swapped in a not-crappy radiator, oil cooler, and a different rear end. There may even be some kind of cheaty suspension on it, but we haven’t bothered to care too much. It’s a Triumph Stag, see. There’s also a fuel cell in the trunk and a raft of spare and available parts to remove as much English manufacturing as possible.
The rollcage has passed tech before and also has belts good through the end of 2021. Of course, any new owner is responsible for crosschecking the car with Lemons current regulations. But we know this car and we like this car. That is probably worth $20, right?
Wartburg, the Sequel?
This isn’t the first giveaway Lemons has helped with, of course. In 2009, an Ohio Lemons team with a Wartburg 311 wanted rid of it and asked if Lemons could hold an essay contest. The winners of that contest were, of course, the early foundings of most-recent overall race winners, Three Pedal Mafia.
That much-publicized Wartburg underwent some substantial surgery to get a Subaru engine and be quasi-drivable. It raced once, winning the Index of Effluency. Last we heard, the Wartburg had migrated back to Ohio and was undergoing conversion into a gasser. It’s not really germane to the discussion; we just think that’s hella sweet.
More Lemons of Love love
Of course, Lemons of Love is our partner for both upcoming 24-hour races at Carolina Motorsports Park and at High Plains Raceway on September 11-13. While we are discouraging bribes in the traditional BS Inspection tradition, racers may instead donate to Lemons of Love for Get Out of Penalty Box Free stickers (Only valid if you’re not doing totally stupid things…as judged by the, uh, judges).
We’ll have more info on these races in the coming days. Suffice to say, it’ll be a weekend of historic 24-hour races and historically bad driving/mechanical preparation.