THE FAILURE IS BIGGER IN TEXAS.
Cadillacs get 50 points at the rally start.
Pre-1960 Pickups (with original running gear) get 150 points at the rally start.
We’ll throw you bonus points each day your team dresses in full cowboy/cowgirl outfits.
Everything is bigger in Texas, so they say, and this rally will be a bit longer than most. Expect 400+ miles per day, but you’ll have more daylight than the last time we visited Texas. Be advised: You will spend long periods of time without cell reception, with no roadside services whatsoever, and in warm temperatures well above sea level. Please plan accordingly with good paper maps and lots of water. We also highly recommend traveling in groups.
DUE TO COVID-19 RESTRICTIONS, THIS RALLY MAY BE DIFFERENT FROM PREVIOUS LEMONS RALLIES. PARTICIPANTS WILL BE EXPECTED TO PRACTICE SOCIAL DISTANCING, TO WEAR MASKS ANY TIME THEY ARE OUT OF VEHICLES, AND TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR FOLLOWING ANY STATE, COUNTY, AND MUNICIPAL REGULATIONS.
Your expectations for the Texas Rattletraps Tour:
• Any and all symptomatic or high-risk entrants must stay home. You are responsible for owning up to, and acting on, your own health condition and risk factors. Late scratch because of this? Email us.
• Face coverings (to keep your own cootie-filled spit goobers in, not to keep the virus out) should be worn in any public area. In short: When you get out of your crapcan, wear a mask. Texas may not have a mask mandate; be better than the gub’mint, mainly because it ain’t that hard.
• Maintain social distancing of at least 6 feet should in any public area.
• Please respect the locals at checkpoints and along the route. Wear face coverings, maintain social distance, and don’t be a douche, in general. Being a douche is subject to points deduction, expulsion from the rally, and public scorn on social media.
• Your immediate social group should be comprised of those in your vehicle. Any time you interact outside your social group, please maintain social distance and wear a mask.
• Keep yourself informed and updated on Texas’s COVID policies. The state of Texas has information on its website (https://www.texas.gov/Covid19/) and so does the Texas Department of Public Health (https://dshs.texas.gov/).
• Wash your damn hands when you can.
DAY 1 (FRI, APR 30): SAN ANTONIO, TX > ABILENE, TX
Estimated 400-450 miles
Rally Launch Site: Texas Transportation Museum, 11731 Wetmore Rd, San Antonio, TX 78247
Onsite registration starts at 7 a.m. sharp. Don’t be late!
Recommended Hotel: Whitten Inn, 1625 TX-351, Abilene, TX 79601
End of Day Meetup: 2 Profs Gourmet Ice Cream, 1989 TX-351, Abilene, TX 79601
DAY 2 (SAT, MAY 1): ABILENE, TX to MARFA, TX
Estimated 425-550 Miles
Recommended Hotel: Maverick Inn, 1200 E. Holland Avenue Alpine, Texas 79830.
Note: There aren’t a ton of hotel rooms in Marfa, but there are some cool/unique/hipster places to stay there if you can find them. Alpine has a few more options.
End of Day Meetup: TBD
DAY 3 (SUN, MAY 2): MARFA, TX > SAN ANTONIO, TX
Estimated 350-525 Miles
FINISH LINE: 7 pm at Texas Transportation Musem, 11731 Wetmore Rd, San Antonio, TX 78247